Hope

Every few days this summer, I've thought to myself: Wow - I need to sit down and write about this so I don't forget the details that aren't in the photos. Good intentions, which have not seen the light of day. I will get around to some more detailed posts about our Seattle explorations, but they'll have to wait. There's exactly one week left until the Faery starts her new school, which means the two months since we moved to Seattle truly have flown by.

On Saturday, J spent the afternoon with some friends of his that he's made through work. They went on a massive 50km bike ride through Seattle, on some kind of brewery sampling mission. Meanwhile, I had another entire afternoon of entertaining the kids and monotonously mind-numbing housework. The deal was that as soon as he got home that night, I could take myself off to go see a movie - which I did. Unfortunately, I was in a bit of 'mood' by the time evening had arrived (discovering four sneaky patches of cat piss on carpet in a not-often used room will do that)... and instead of cheering up, I felt even worst after the movie.

Once I returned home, I realised the problem was that I was feeling 'lost'. Acutely aware that I only have a couple of friends here (known from years ago), and good old-fashioned down in the dumps. Christ, we've barely been here two months - during a part of the year where there's no routine, structure, and little in the way of opportunities to meet people. I need to go easier on myself, I know. These things take time, and I've already signed up for various new ventures here which will help (more on that another time), so it's not like I'm sitting around moaning without actually making an effort - I just need to make patience a new virtue, mantra, or whatever it is... and get back into some bloody yoga!

So there we have it. I had a bit of a pity party on Saturday, which carried though into Sunday.

Then, Sunday afternoon saw us attend a neighbourhood picnic party at our local park. It was an annual event put on by the American equivalent of a local council - sort of like a block party. Have I mentioned how there's a really lovely sense of community in out new area? We just needed to bring a side dish or dessert to share, and the rest was taken care of. We signed up on arrival, were given name tags to wear, and promptly feasted on barbecued burgers and hotdogs, curries,  and frozen yoghurt (provided by the local restaurants and shops)... a Ben & Jerry's ice cream truck even turned up to hand out ice cream.

There was a balloon dude for the kids, face-painting, water balloon tossing contest, bubbles and chalk - leaving J and I free to chat and meet other folks and parents in our neighbourhood. It was fantastic. When the rain arrived and it was time to leave, we left knowing a bunch of new faces and names, kids who were similar ages to ours, and parents from the same school that the Faery will attend - along with praise sung about the school. We met people who'd lived in the Seattle area all their lives, and people who were transplants like us, with Australian and British ties. I'd been invited along to trivia nights and girly drinks.

All in all, it was reassuring. My 'mood' had shifted, and I was glad we'd taken the time to attend.

I came home feeling hopeful for my own happiness here.

(On a side note, after giving it much thought recently, I'm doing away with watermarking my photos. Lately, I've been shifting away from photo-editing/processing in general. With the exception of Instagram - and even then I don't add filters as much as I used to - the most I can be bothered with is a little straightening and cropping when required. I'm deriving more pleasure in keeping an image as true to the one that landed on my phone or camera, and aiming for better shots to begin with. The water-marking issue mostly comes down to a time factor and laziness, but I've also realised that if someone really wanted to steal an image of mine, they'd simply crop out the watermark anyway. I don't condone it, but I can't stop it.)

Week One

The last couple of weeks we spent in Los Angeles were pretty much a clichéd whirlwind of craziness - bittersweet lunches, dinners and playdates with friends we'll miss, attempts to at least organise our belongings for the packers, and endless phone calls to coordinate the move itself - I have a stack of photos which I'll save for a later post.

We survived, but not without a fair amount of sweat (J & I) and tears (the Faery and - okay - me).
In some ways, though, the physical act of getting our things from A to B - 1,800 km apart - has seemed much easier this time round, compared to a year ago when we moved apartments within the same complex. There's a lot to be said for having other people pack and do all the lifting.

Four suitcases, two backpacks, two adults, two kids, and one caged cat later... we arrived at SeaTac Airport with surprisingly minimal drama, last Wednesday. Everything else we own is currently on a truck somewhere along the West Coast, to be expected any day now. We have the keys to our new place but it is empty for now.

Somewhere between getting off the plane, and getting our rental car.

First drizzly afternoon stroll, dodging slugs.

Even the sides of busy roads here have been beautified.

We arrived to drizzle, and I was little bummed after the amazing weather we'd been having down south. I'd known what to expect, but the immediate grey skies still disappointed me. Little did I know that a day later, the clouds would clear and a heat wave would roll in over the entire West Coast. Seattle is already a stunning city under grey skies, but when the sun comes out to play? Oh my. I cannot get over the green beauty of this place.

With temperatures peaking in the early 30s (Celsius), it was surprising to learn just how much I can sweat - despite these temps being nothing new to me, it was the humidity factor that I'd not had to deal with at all during our three years in L.A. High humidity and no air con in our  temporary accommodation has made for some incredibly sticky nights - reminiscent of Sydney summers. Seattle, I had no idea. There's a cool breeze today, and I never imagined I'd be so grateful for this, so soon after arriving here.

Lucky for us, the area we've been staying in has an amazing lakeside beach, with an equally gorgeous park next to it.  Although we've visited a number of playgrounds and waterfront parks since arriving, we spent several evenings at Idylwood Beach Park (doesn't the name alone sound like paradise?) during the peak of the heat wave, taking in the games of croquet and volleyball, families barbecuing, and kids diving off the lake's jetty as others surf paddle in the distance - all under the watchful gaze of teenaged lifeguards. That old saying 'to make hay while the sun shines' rings especially true around here. Unlike Los Angelenos, I get the feeling that Seattleites don't take the sun for granted.

My first solo sunset stroll in many, many months.

Idylwood Beach Park

Idylwood Beach Park

Kirkland Marina Park

Spins and secrets

The other thing that has me smitten are the (even) longer days. The sun doesn't set until after 9pm these days, which means it's still light and dusky at 10pm. Lengthy daylight hours have always been my favourite thing about summer, and I particularly loved summer in London because of this - many a late evening were spent in beer gardens as the sky slowly turned a deep azure. In the past, I've always been a stickler for strict early kiddo bedtimes, but the long days here are playing havoc with the girls' usual bedtime routine. We've relaxed about it because a) it's been so hot that it takes forever to fall asleep anyway, and b) there's no early morning school run to deal with, so isn't this what holidays are for? Besides, I think J has missed the girls so much that he is savouring his time with them when he comes home from work. Once they are in bed, it's still light enough for the two of us to enjoy a drink outside - even at half-past nine.

It's only been a week, but Seattle summer? I think I love you.

Emily agrees that late twilight hours are pretty cool.

The three year itch

When we decided to move to Los Angeles, we knew it would be for three or four years, depending on how things panned out for J with his new job. Maybe we'd all be miserable and return to Australia sooner, or maybe J would absolutely love the job and we'd have the option of staying on for a few more years. There was no crystal ball to help us out, and it was somewhat of a leap of faith. Neither of us had even been to L.A. before.

We are only six weeks shy of having lived here for three years already, and the last few months have seen us reevaluating where we want to be.

J's professional journey isn't my story to tell, but for a number of strong reasons, he's decided it's time to move on from his current job. So... he cast a net out and tried his best to see what else is out there in the US for him. A lot of sweat and sleepless nights, interviews, and winning people over.

And... it paid off. An offer was made recently that seems too good to be true - both financially, and in terms of a career trajectory for J. He sold himself very well, and is stoked that there are people out there who seem to recognise his potential, and want him on their team. I'm proud of him.

It's an offer that has us pinching ourselves. It will be a game-changer for us, and allow us to rid our debts quickly (unlike the naïve expectations we had moving when to L.A, before the reality of the cost of living here - on a single income - kicked in). A significant pay-rise and employment package which will not only enable us to kick our debts to the curb, but to properly save for a home, visit Australia more often, and start chasing our dreams of further travel together as a family.

There's just one catch - the new job won't be in Los Angeles. Our time in La La Land is drawing to an end.

Yeah, you probably saw that coming... we're moving to Seattle. Time to dig out my old Pearl Jam and Nirvana albums! Our recent weekend trip was more than just a random visit and catch-up with friends. We wanted to get a feel for the place, and check out the areas where we'd likely move to. Although we'd both been to Seattle many years ago, we needed to see it from a fresh perspective this time - is it somewhere that we think our little family will be happy?

Clean, fresh air is a good start. As is the fact we'll be more financially secure and able to pursue interests we've been wanting to for a long time. I feel lucky that we have an opportunity to experience life in another beautiful corner of the world, and am excited about the fresh new start.

This move will be bittersweet, though. We've made some wonderful friends here in L.A, especially since the Faery started school. I mean, it's one thing to "approve of" the kids that your child has chosen as little mates, but then to get along so well with their families and find you're on the same page as them with many things, and actually look forward to your families hanging out together socially - from what I've heard, not everyone is lucky to strike up such rich friendships from their kids' schools. I have some truly lovely girlfriends now, and knowing that they won't be a regular part of my life for much longer is probably the thing that makes me the saddest and most anxious about moving. I'm not too happy at the thought of starting from scratch, socially, once we move up there. We do have a few friends there but we'll be living in a different part of Seattle to them. I'll need to work on making new friends closer to home, and the older I get, the more daunting this feels.

I also worry about the Faery - she adores her friends, and one in particular is a real kindred spirit with her. I'm sad and anxious about putting physical distance between them, but we always knew L.A. wasn't going to be forever.

Another 'issue' will be the weather. It's a superficial thing, yes, but don't underestimate the impact of mostly grey skies and damp air. I've lived it before, in London. I'm determined I won't let it get under my skin this time. Seattle isn't London, our circumstances are very different, and... I just have to let go of the notion of me not digging winter. Put on my big girl panties.

Hopefully these drawbacks can be dealt with by the odd weekend visit to L.A. - a dose of sunshine and to hang out with friends. I've already promised the Faery that she and I can have a few girly weekends doing this, in the hope that the knowledge will ease the transition for her. We have a while yet, though. J will start his new job in spring, but the girls and I are going to stay back until the end of the school year so that the Faery won't need to change schools until the new school year begins. I feel strongly about that, so I offered to hang back here and do the solo parent thing for a few months, while J settles into his job and looks for a place for us to live in.

I'm trying to remind myself that moving from L.A. to Seattle is going to be much easier than our move from Sydney to L.A.  For one, we've actually been there and have an idea what to expect. Secondly, it'll just be a matter of packing our things onto the back of a truck (as opposed to selling things, storing things, shipping some things, and buying the rest at the other end). Thirdly, it's not like we're moving to yet another country where we have to figure everything out again. We're used to driving on the right-hand side now, we have our social security numbers, and a general understanding of how things work here.

All in all, though, this has been a lot to process. It's been on the cards for a few months, and only just been made official. All this time, J and I have discussed every thing there is to consider, at great length, but had to keep the news secret from family and friends - just in case it fell through. It's like first trimester pregnancy all over again, when you're bursting to be able to talk about it openly but the reality is only a couple of select friends or family know. Part of my way of dealing with this has been to draft this post, very s-l-o-w-l-y.

Hitting the 'publish' button will never feel as good as with this post, I suspect. Let's find out...


(PS - Not long after J accepted the new job, his current workplace announced they would be cutting jobs by twenty per cent. Scary stuff. Upon hearing the news, we knew beyond a doubt we've made the right decision.)

On the move

After the Big Move here - for a long time - I was unable to deal with the thought of moving again. It wasn't just that we'd made an international move with a newborn and preschooler, but only months prior to that, we'd had to move house in Sydney. I was 35 weeks pregnant with Miss Pie and Sydney was one hot bath of humidity - or maybe it was my pregnancy.

At any rate, I was in no hurry to move again for a while.

The apartment we found here ticked most of our boxes. Fridge, washing machine and dryer included; open living space; outside patio space for the kids to play; no staircases (I sensed that lugging bags of shopping up from the underground parking, along with a young baby and stroller was going to be complicated enough - let alone having extra flights of steps to deal with). The complex is in a convenient location - J cycles to work most days, and there is a supermarket on the next block. It doesn't feel like we live in an apartment because in the complex, all all the apartments have their own entrances - even the upstairs ones. There are no grimy hallways, just paved walkways and gardens.

So far, so good... but not completely.

Our apartment - being on the ground level - is located immediately adjacent to one of the main security gates into the complex. People slam that motherfucking gate from 6 am most mornings, as they leave for work. Consequently, the Faery and Miss Pie start the day early. As for Friday and Saturday nights, it gets pretty noisy out the front too. Even more annoying is the number of visitors (and residents) who think it's perfectly acceptable to call out over the gate for one of us to come open it, like it's our duty. Umm, no. I've become pretty good at ignoring unfamiliar faces at that gate.

We're a little bit over the constant human traffic past our place and lack of privacy (the guest parking is right beneath us, and the lift is just on the other side of the gate). Of all the various buildings in this complex, we ended up in the busiest section.

We're more than a little bit over our sleep's quality being dependent on the upstairs neighbours. Their living room is directly above our bedroom, and their front door and stair case is right next to the girls' bedroom. Whether they're gangsters (true story) or hyenas (also true), we haven't had much luck.

Time for a change, then.

We've been keeping our eyes open for different place within the same complex, but didn't want to pay a whole lot more than we do now. We figured there was no rush, and that when the right place came along, we'd move.

Two weeks ago, we found it - ready to move in at the end of June. It's in a much quieter section of the complex. It has its own external flight of steps (it's above a ground floor apartment) and has two levels. One of the other reasons we wanted a change is that, currently, the girls' bedroom is right next to our living room. The idea of entertaining friends in the evenings has always been a bit daunting - as if we'd be disturbing the girls. The new apartment layout means our bedrooms are upstairs, away from the living space.

(I just need to find some friends to entertain now - joking)

We'll still have a patio, which will be smaller... but at least it's private. We won't have any noisy morons above our bedrooms to keep us awake. Also, now that Miss Pie is bigger, the idea of stairs isn't scary any more. The stroller and groceries are still going to be a pain, but we'll manage. And bonus? A truck will not be required for the move. Just a shitload of going back and forth with some rented trolleys. A few mates to help with the furniture, and hopefully it won't be too bad.

Incredibly, it'll only be $40 a month extra - despite having being almost 200 square feet bigger (whatever the hell that is in metric).

I'm a little amazed at the amount of stuff we've accrued in our two years here. Some serious spring cleaning is order, which I've started making inroads into - trying not to feel too mean for throwing out three large bags' worth of prechool artwork... and counting.

I'm looking forward to being in a bigger, quieter apartment... but I still hate moving. Desperately wishing there was a cheat sheet for it, or at the very least, some family members to materialise out of thin air and whisk the girls away for a day or two.

Luckily, I have the knowledge that we've survived much bigger moves.

It's going to be fine.